The following rite was written by Emma Restall Orr, with numerous sources
of inspiration, not least the many families for whom she has performed
such rituals over the years.
The Sacred Rite of Naming and Welcoming a Child
When
Most often this is a rite performed for an infant or
baby during the first year of his or her life. To do it during the period
when a child is starting to toddle, exploring yet still with the clumsiness
of his innocence, can make it a little more chaotic, for to hold such
a child in sacred space and with focus is neither feasible nor fair. Usually
the parents (or those in loco parentis) choose to have the ritual
when the child is still young enough to hold, to sleep in arms; magically,
at such an age, the child is less distracted by the physical world and
absorbing all about him/her more profoundly.
If there is or has been a serious problem in the child,
the rite may be done earlier, to ensure that the parents, family and community
feel secure that he/she is acknowledged and blessed as fully as is possible.
Although it is usual for the recipient of the rite to
be a newly born child, adults themselves do sometimes request this rite,
or perform it for themselves. This is often the case when they have journeyed
through significant healing of an abusive or negating childhood, and would
wish to make a ritual that declares magically their change, their re-birth,
and perhaps a name taken by themselves. Aspects of the ritual can in this
case be used, with others adapted or removed.
Where
It does not matter where such rites are done, for it
is equally valid to have such rites in one's own back garden as on the
moors, the beach, in the forest or the grounds of a hotel. Some choose
the ancient sites, stone circles and standing stones, allowing them a
clear connection with the distant ancestors and our heritage, while others
feel these too solemn for a small child.
Preparing of the Venue
Wherever the rite is performed, making prayers of blessing
to cleanse and consecrate may be appropriate. In the same way there is
value, of course, in clearing the site of hazards if families and young
children will be present. The spirits of place should be honoured, with
the celebrant or parents asking if the rite would be accepted and inspired.
If the spirits are accepting, the rite will feel their harmonious energy;
if they do not, the day will be jarred with complications.
Where appropriate and desired, a temple space can be
created, with a sacred Circle delineated and decorated as required. Many
Circles are created with flowers, boughs of wood, hops or sheaves of corn,
depending on the time of year. The Circle can be cast magically, but even
where it is gently drawn - allowing guests (and children) to leave or
return - the Circle does bring a stronger focus to the rite.
Where young children may be present at the rite, the
parents and celebrant must decide if it is acceptable for them to be wandering
or running around inside the Circle or if it would be distracting and
they should be kept out of its delineation. While a formal rite might
have only the parents and child within, a less formal rite may have everyone
sitting around in a circle amidst the natural hubub of family life.
An altar also encourages a clearer focus for those gathered.
It could be stone or wood, a low table or covered box. It may be decorated
with flowers or foliage of the season, and have upon it the tools for
consecration, feasting and other essentials for the rite.
The Participants
This rite is written to be led by one celebrant. This
could be a priest trained in the tradition, whose role is to hold the
energy of the rite and ensure that the rite is performed with sufficient
magic and honour. However, for a less formal or more private rite, these
words, with more added or some removed, may be spoken by any member of
the gathering.
In this rite, together with the parents and the child
to be blessed, there are also the parents' parents/grandparents and those
to be installed as guardians of the child. These guardians may also be
called god-parents or goddess-parents. Ushers are useful people in any
rite where there are a fair number of guests persent, allowing the parents
to focus on the rite unconcerned.
The Ceremony
The ceremony itself is wholly flexible, adapting to the
desires of the parents. Here is an example to be used as you would wish.
It is written for a girl,
instead of stating his/her, son/daughter, at every instance,
simply for the sake of clarity. Needless to say, the rite is easily adapted
for a boy (excuse the cliché
in colours!).
THE TEMPLE IS MADE
The ushers encourage the guests to gather around the
Circle. The child and her parents stand at the Circle’s edge. The
priest bids everyone welcome giving an outline of the ceremony. She calls
to the Spirits of Place that the rite may be done with their guidance
and inspiration. She then makes the Call for Peace:
Let
there be peace in the East, so let it be.
Let there be peace in the South, so let it be.
Let there be peace in the West, so let it be.
Let there be peace in the North, so let it be.
Let there be peace through all the Worlds.
So
let it be.
All present are guided to be fully present.
We
gather here in peace for this joyful and sacred occasion that is the First
Rite of Passage on the journey we each make upon this Earth. As our Circle
is woven and consecrated, this moment in time and this place becomes blessed.
Let each soul truly be here that the spirits of those gathered may be
blended in one sacred space, with one purpose and one voice.
The Circle is cast or loosely woven, depending on the
wishes of the parents. It is consecrated by the priest, creating and blessing
the temple for the rite.
So
do we call to the spirits of the Three Worlds, that this rite be blessed
by the powers of all Creation.
Hail
spirits of this sacred land, you whose beauty and power inspires us, as
you have inspired those who came before us.
Spirits
of the high skies that guide us to stretch and grow; gentle lord of the
sun, distant stars, ancestral light; cloud folk who paint such art above
us; breath of life, soft breeze and chasing winds; feathered folk who
know the dance of freedom upon the wing.
Spirits
of the dark earth that holds and feeds us; mud of our lands, rich and
fertile soil into which we so deeply root; rocks and stones, gems of the
earth, you who give us stability underfoot; trees and plants, creatures
four footed and two.
Spirits
of the open seas that wash and shape the shores of these lands; meandering
rivers, guiding our direction, birthing springs of new life, deep still
pools holding us upon our journey; you of the tidal waters, emerging and
receding, blood and rain, swimming, diving.
You
who offer us freedom, nourishment and rebirth. As our ancestors knew and
honoured your power, so do we now. Honour this our rite, we ask you. Inspire
and bless those gathered. Blessed be as blessed is.
Offerings are made to the Spirits of Place by the priest.
She welcomes the parents and child into the Circle and, if they wish,
they too give offereings to the Spirits of Place. The purpose of the rite
is then declared.
We
gather together on this the (date), on the (moon), in the year (year),
in the eye of the Sun and upon this hallowed Earth, to witness this sacred
Rite that is the Naming and Welcoming of your (number) child. We come
to give thanks for the wonder of new life, to honour the task of parenthood,
to thank this child for entering our community.
THE ANCESTORS ARE HONOURED
To
know where we have come, let us first honour what and whom have brought
us to this place.
In
the name of our gods and the gods of our ancestors, we give thanks for
all those who have shared with us their lives, their wisdom and their
love. On this sacred day of her First Rite, we give thanks especially
for the blessings bequeathed to this child by her ancestors of blood and
spirit, both those newly departed and those of old.
As
spirit dancing in body, creating our lives and the worlds within which
we live, we are connected, each soul a part of the web of life. With each
thought and movement we touch the web, each word, each song humming upon
its shimmering threads. In a family this web of spirit is vivid in colour
and form, as blood shared, stories and genes, in a delicate pattern. As
a new child enters the world, she brings together, in blood, two families,
creating a new seam. At this time, so we honour the grandparents of this
child.
The parents give gifts to their own parents (and grandparents).
AFFIRMING THE UNION
The priest speaks to the parents, acknowledging the enormous
changes effected by the arrival of a child into their lives. Particular
problems overcome may be spoken of here. It is usually best at this stage
if the child is held by someone else at the edge of the Circle, leaving
the couple time alone together.
(Names
of parents), over the years of your relationship, you have explored and
expressed your love together, questing inspiration and sharing your creativity.
Yet now there is another soul whose energy plays around and between you,
creating new and exquisite patterns, sometimes tangling the threads, always
changing the world you had before. For a moment, now, take each others
hands and behold each other, as if for the first time.
The parents face each other, holding hands.
Through
the changes of parenthood, you have grown, revealing new facets, new strengths,
skills, depths of courage, new weaknesses and tenderness, yet through
it all there is the opportunity for your love and your union to grow richer
and stronger. Now, for a moment, see in each other the person they have
become
Witnessed
by your families, your community, your ancestors and the spirits of this
sacred land, do you again vow to each other your love, your loyalty and
your commitment?
PARENTS : We do.
Then
let it be so.
The parents make their personal vows to each other and
the exchange of gifts. Celebration, applause, congratulations may be given
according to the importance of this part of the ritual to the particular
couple (for example, it may be their first witnessed rite of commitment).
THE COMMITMENT TO THE CHILD
The child is then brought back
to the parents.
(Names
of parents), you
have brought your daughter to this place on the occasion of her First
Rite. As her parents, you have principal responsibility for the wellbeing
of her body and soul, throughout the journey of her childhood. Do you
agree to hold this responsibility wholeheartedly, in freedom, with love
and joy, with patience and with trust?
COUPLE : We
do.
Then
let it be so.
The parents make their personal vows to the child, presenting
her gift that symbolize these vows. The gifts may be something the child
will keep throughout her life, a family heirloom, or simply a symbol of
the words they have spoken.
THE CHILD'S GUARDIANS
(Names
of parents), you have chosen three people to act as guardians for your
daughter.
The guardians step forward from the edge of the Circle.
Do
you, (names of guardians), come here of your own free will, agreeing to
take on this role as guardian to this child?
GUARDIANS : We
do.
The parents may be asking the guardians for specific
help, or may have a very clear idea about what the guardians role should
be. These ideas can be spoken here. The words here are a guide:
According
to the Old Traditions within which this rite is made, we do not offer
the journey of the child’s life to one deity, nor do we bind her
to one path, religious or mundane. Instead, our role is simply to honour
and give thanks that she has come to our lives. As she reaches into adulthood,
in many moons to come, well blessed by the holding of her family and friends,
she will make her own decisions with pride and certainty. Until then,
you have been asked by her parents to be a support to her, guiding her
to find love with trust, freedom in safety, peace with vitality, to live
in a sacred manner. Do you agree to act as this child’s guardians?
GUARDIANS : We
do.
Then
let it be so.
The guardians make their statements of commitment or
give their vows, presenting the child with a gift that symbolizes that
commitment. They may do this together, reading or reciting one vow that
they all share, or individual guardians may make their own offering of
commitment.
The parents may then give gifts to the guardians, in
thanks for the commitment offered and for the support that this in turn
gives to them.
THE BLESSING OF THE CHILD
The child is then blessed by the
elements of creation. Specific deities or spirits may be invoked for this,
according to the specific religious practice of the parents. The words
here are simply a guide:
Honouring
the power of nature, within us and around us, goddess of this sacred land,
power of moon, womb of creation, god of sun, blade of light and corn,
powers of the rain, the high seas and thunder, gods of our ancestors,
we bring this child for your blessings.
The parents then take the child to the four cardinal
directions. They might begin with the north, where she is laid upon the
ground.
(north) Spirits
of the North, powers of winter, guardians of earth and stone, strength
of wolf and badger, who you teach us of love and loyalty, great bear of
the starry skies, Lady of the sacred womb, the rich soil of creation,
bless this child with your gifts : true stability, security, nourishment,
certainty, the source of rich and fertile creativity.
The child is blessed with a symbol of earth. This may
be soft mud smeared upon the soles of her feet, a consecrated stone given
to her, or bread, or a gift of metal. The parents or priest may make the
blessing, or a guardian, another guest or family member whom the parents
feel is appropriate for such a role.
In the east, the child is held up to the skies.
(east) Spirits
of the East, powers of spring, of conception, regeneration, vision of
falcon and blackbird’s song, swallows’ freedom flight, sylphs
of the wind, breath of life, Lord of the rising sun and all new life,
bless this child with your gifts : freedom, clarity, open hearted wisdom,
pure inspiration, the power of listening. knowledge awakening, the magic
of song.
The child is blessed with a symbol of air. As with earth,
the blessing can be made by whoever is felt to be appropriate. A song
may be sung for the child, bubbles blown, feathers fanning her, or important
books of poetry, philosophy, mythology, given as gifts for her lifelong.
In the south, the child is in the father’s arms.
(south) Spirits
of the South, powers of summer, pride of stag, fire wit of fox, dragons
of the land, sprites of the dancing flame, you who teach us of courage
and the power of truth, Lord of the Greenwood, bless this child with your
gifts : strength, vitality, clear vision, passion, the courage to be who
she can truly be.
The child is blessed with a symbol of fire, again by
an appropriate person, the priest or parents. This blessing may be the
gift of a candle or lantern, something bright with colour or wild energy.
If acceptable, whisky or mead may be offered, or wild berries to signify
the sweetness of life untamed.
In the west, the child is held in the arms of the mother.
(west) Spirits
of the West, powers of autumn, wild cat and silent owl, stretching to
hunt at dusk, wisdom of salmon and otter’s play, undines of chuckling
brook, devas that dance our love and emotion, Lady of the Seas, tides
of being, bless this child with your gifts : flexibility, direction, love
in perfect trust, flow of emotion, rich creativity.
The child is blessed with symbol of water. She may be
touched by water, a little poured upon her, or a gift given such as a
sea shell, chalice, cup or cauldron.
They return to the altar and thanks are given.
THE NAMING OF THE CHILD
Blessed
by the powers of creation, this child begins her journey of life, and
for her path, she is offered a name. As she grows and chooses her own
way, she may accept or take another name for herself, but she is yet at
the beginning of her journey. There is power in a name. It is an invocation
and a prayer, a gift that is given with poignancy and emotion. (couple),
what is the name that you now offer to your daughter?
PARENTS : (name).
Here the parents may like to explain to those gathered
why such a name was chosen. The stories that are relevant may be told.
Something may be given to the child that she may know when she grows up
why her name was chosen.
Witnessed
by her families, her community, her ancestors in body and those in spirit,
the gods of her ancestors and those of the land, this child is given her
name. (name). Let us welcome her, by her name, saying together :
The child is held up as all those gathered call the welcome.
ALL : (name),
welcome! (name), welcome! (name), welcome!
THE CELEBRATION
In
order to know in certainty that the flow of this rite is done, we share,
while still in the sanctity of the Circle, a celebratory drink.
It is traditional in Druidic rites to celebrate within
the sacred space of the ritual, sharing with the spirits of place, ancestors
and the gods, declaring a ritual done. Bread and mead are usually used,
but cake and champagne can be substituted, or any other drink and food.
The priest blesses the feast, the first of both being given back to the
land as an offering. The parents may then like to give some to each other
and to the child (symbolically if the child is still too young). If the
parents wish, they can then move around the Circle, sharing the feast
with each, a sip of mead and a chunk of bread. If a toast is to be made
during the rite, glasses may be filled and this is the time, with speeches
made by those who wish to make them.
Everyone then returns to the edge of the Circle.
THANKSGIVING
This may be done as fully or simply as required. The
following is a simple form:
On
behalf of (names of parents), and (name of child), I give thanks to all
those who have gathered here this day, in body and in spirit, seen and
unseen. To the ancestors who have come to witness this rite, those of
(child)’s bloodline, of the land and our heritage, we give you thanks
for your presence, your blessings and your teachings. From this Circle,
we bid you hail and farewell.
To
the spirits of the four directions and the elements of creation, earth,
air, fire, water, we give you thanks for the blessings gifted to (child)
this day. From this Circle, we bid you hail and farewell.
To
the spirits of this place, those of the high skies, of the fertile earth
beneath us and the seas that hold us, we give you thanks for accepting
and inspiring this our rite. From this Circle, we bid you hail and farewell.
Before
our rite comes to its end, the Circle opened, let us take a moment in
silence to feel what has been gained, that when we leave this place we
take with us its gifts, memories rich and real, so honouring fully that
which inspires us, and the beautiful child who has brought us together,
(child).
The Circle is unwoven or uncast, final words spoken of
thanks, affirming peace, and inviting all those gathered to move onto
the celebratory feast or whatever is planned.
Blessed Be as Blessed Is
© Emma Restall Orr 2000
